Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Our Band of Brothers Chapter Three - Justin's Epiphany


Our Band of Brothers Chapter Three – Justin’s Epiphany

Jean-Francois lay in Henri’s arms, thinking about everything he had learned about the guys today.   Greg and Cory’s experience with their Dad had shaken him to his core.   He couldn’t imagine how a parent could turn against their own flesh and blood.   It was in complete contrast to his mother, who had always been very accepting and supportive of him.   He had come out to her, when he was fourteen years old.  He had also come out to his cousin, Jean-Michael, at the same time.   It had been a good thing that he had a safe harbor at home, because he didn’t have it in school.  

J.F. hadn’t come out to anyone at school.  In fact, he had tried to hide the fact he was gay.  At some point, he had slipped up and word had gotten out that he was gay.   The jocks at school had harassed him constantly, whenever Jean-Michael wasn’t around.

After he graduated from Falls High School (École secondaire des Chutes), he met Henri through some friends.  He smiled as he remembered their first face to face meeting.

*** ***

Jean-Francois stood in front of the mirror in his room, primping.   His dark brown hair was spiked, and he wore diamond studs (a gift from his mother).  He was very nervous about going out on his first blind date.  His friend, Martel, had set him up with Henri.   He wore tight-fitting jeans and a white mesh muscle shirt with an unbuttoned, blue plaid, long sleeve shirt over the top.  He had rolled up the sleeves of the shirt nearly to his elbows.  J.M. had helped him shave off all of his body hair earlier in the day.   J.M. had teased him about being a twink. 

His chocolate brown eyes met his cousin’s eyes in the mirror.  “Do I look okay?  I don’t’ want to look like a slut.”

 Jean-Michael looked at his cousin, and said, “J.F. you look great!  Stop worrying about how you look.  Henri already thinks your super hot from the photos you sent him!”

J.F. turned to J.M., and said, “I want to make a good first impression.  What if he doesn’t like me?”

They heard the doorbell ring.  J.F. was off like he had been shot.  J.M. followed him at a more sedate pace.   He arrived in the foyer, in time to see his Aunt Loren opening the door to admit Henri.

She said, “Welcome to our home, Henri.”

He replied, “Thank you, Ma’am.”  His face lit up with a huge smile, when he saw Jean-Francois.

J.F. came forward to take Henri’s hand.  “I’m Jean-Francois.”

Henri said, “I’m Henri Girard.”

“Come with me, please,” J.F. said, leading him into the front room.  He sat down on the loveseat, with Henri joining him.

J.M. and Loren followed them into the front room, and seated themselves on the couch opposite the two young men. 

Loren asked, “Henri, are you from around here?”

“Yes, I’m from Trois Rivieres,” he responded.   “I’m the oldest of three children.  I have two younger brothers.  My Mom and Dad are very Catholic, but are very open minded about gays.  I came out to them when I was in high school.

Loren stated, “How old are you?”

J.F. said, “I already told you how old he is, Mom.”

“I know, dear, but I’m just confirming what you said,” she said, smiling at Henri.

“I’m 22 years old.  I hope you don’t mind me dating your son, Mrs. Fortin.”

“Please call me Mom, Henri, and I’m fine with you dating my son,” Loren said.  “I just wanted to know more about you, before you take my most prized possession out on the town.”

Henri smiled.  “I promise to bring him home safe.”

Loren said, “I’m sure you will.”

J.F. stood up, and turned to pull Henri to his feet.  Henri liked the feel of J.F.’s small hands in his.  He gave J.F. a quick once over, and smiled, broadly, at his date.  J.F. returned Henri’s smile.  He, also, liked what he saw.  He had already given Henri the once over, as he waited to introduce himself to him in the foyer.  Henri was everything he thought he would be – tall, dark, and extremely handsome.

*** ***

He was brought back to the present by Henri’s soft touch on his cheek.  “What are you thinking about, J.F.?”

“I was thinking about the first time I saw you,” J.F. responded, reaching up to take Henri’s hand in his.

Henri smiled, “I’m glad to see you smile.”

J.F. said, “I’ve been thinking about J.M.’s roommates.  They have been through so much.”

Henri said, “Yes, they have.  I think they can help you, J.F., because they know the pain you’re going through.”

J.F. nodded his head in agreement.  “They do know.”

Henri said, “I think Peyton has been through some terrible things.  I was watching him, as Justin narrated his story.  He is still suffering from whatever happened to him.”

J.F. said, “I sensed that, as well.  Jonathan is very protective of him, just as you are of me.”

Henri smiled, and said, “You’re right, J.F., I did notice how Jonathan and Peyton interact with each other.”

“Whatever happened, it must be recent, because no one spoke of it, tonight,” J.F. said.  “I think all of them are protecting Peyton.”

Henri thought for a moment about what J.F. had said about Peyton.  He went over in his mind the little things he had noticed about Peyton and Jonathan, specifically how the others acted around them.  He had overheard Greg asking Peyton how he was doing.  He hadn’t heard the response, but when he walked into the room, they had suddenly stopped talking.

“I think you might be right, but I think it’s because Peyton is very fragile and needs to be sheltered,” Henri said.  He explained what he had overheard.

J.F. said, “When I first met Peyton, I wanted to reach out and help him.  I could see that he was suffering much more than I am.”

They both went silent for a while, until they both started talking at the same time.  Henri laughed, and said, “You go first.”

J.F. kissed him, and said, “Thank you, mon cher.  Je t’aime (I love you).  I think we should move here.  Maybe we can even become roommates here.  Justin said that he and his husband want to move to their own place.”

Henri looked at J.F. in surprise, and asked, “Why do you want to move here, J.F.?”

“I just feel comfortable here.  I think we would be happy here,” J.F. said.

“What will we do?” Henri asked.  “I don’t have work, and neither do you.”

“We can find work.  Justin is a businessman and I’m sure he has connections,” J.F. said, confidently.

“I’m not sure we should take advantage of our friends in that way,” Henri said.

“Let’s, at least, ask them what they think,” J.F. said.

“Okay, but I don’t like the idea of leaning on them for a job.  If we can find our own work, I’ll agree to move here.  Plus, did you think about what we need to do, before we can move here?” Henri asked.

“Yes, I have.  We can apply for student visas, just like J.M.  I would like to go to school, here,” J.F. said.

Henri looked at J.F., and asked, “Are you okay, J.F.?  I’m thinking that you’re not in your right mind.”

J.F. laughed.  “I’m in my right mind, Henri, I assure you.”

J.F.’s laugh was a good indication he was feeling better, but Henri wasn’t sure he was quite sane, at the moment.  Moving to Minneapolis was the last thing he wanted to do.  He wanted them to be married, first, before they made any big decisions about where they would live.

He ran his hands over J.F.’s baby smooth skin.  J.F. grinned, and said, “That tickles.”

“Good, I want to tickle you somewhere else,” Henri said, kissing his lover.

J.F. looked deeply into Henri’s eyes.  “I want you in me, now.”

As he complied with J.F.’s request, Henri said, “I love you, Jean-Francois.”

*** ***

Jonathan held Peyton in his arms, and kissed him.  “What do you think about our friends from Quebec?”

Peyton rubbed noses with his husband, and said, “I like them, especially J.M.  He’s really hot.”

Jonathan said, “I agree.  He seems like a pretty standup guy, but what about his cousin, J.F.?”

“I’m thinking Justin is right about him.  J.F. needs a lot of support right now, just as I do.”

Jonathan asked, “Are you saying you want to share with them your experiences, like Justin, Greg and Cory did?”

Peyton pondered the question for a few minutes.  “I’m not sure about that.  I wanted us to start fresh, without the issue of my jail time hanging over our heads.  I’m afraid sharing my experiences would only serve to remind me of what I want to leave behind.”

Jonathan said, “I think we should wait, Babe.  We don’t know these guys very well, and you don’t know how they will react.”

Peyton said, “You’re right, as always, Jonathan.”  He kissed his husband, and said, “I love you.”

“Speaking of love, I want you to make love to me, Peyton,” Jonathan said.  “It’s your turn to fuck me.”

Peyton smiled, running his hand over Jonathan’s six-pack abs.  “It would be my pleasure.”

Afterward, they lay in each other arms, enjoying the euphoria that follows fantastic sex with someone you love! 

A short time later, Peyton asked, “Are you still awake?”

Jonathan mumbled, sleepily, “Yes, Babe.”

“We need to make an appointment with Dr. Hansen, tomorrow,” Peyton said.

Jonathan said, “Okay.”

“All that talk about being abused and beaten has brought back bad memories,” Peyton said.

Jonathan, now wide awake, said, “Do you need your sleeping pills?”

Peyton nodded his head, as his body started to tremble and shake from the memories of being beaten and sexually assaulted flooded his mind.  Jonathan got up, and left the room.   He made his way to the kitchen.   He was surprised to see the light was on.  He entered the kitchen to find that J.F. sitting at the kitchen table. 

J.F. looked up, and his eyes went wide, as he looked over Jonathan’s naked body.   Jonathan smiled, “Do you like what you see?”

J.F. nodded his head, and grinned.  “Yes, you look wonderful.  Do you guys always run around without your clothes?”

Jonathan said, “I can’t speak for the other guys; but we aren’t nudists, so we don’t walk around naked all the time.  We sleep naked and I didn’t stop to pull on my underwear.  I didn’t expect anyone to still be awake.  Peyton is having a rough night, so I came down to get his medication and a glass of water.”

J.F. asked, “What happened to Peyton?”

Jonathan said, “You will have to ask Peyton that question, but I can tell you that it was just as bad as what you heard from the others.  Peyton is still recovering from what happened.”

Jonathan walked over to the sink.   He opened a cupboard and grabbed a glass.  He turned on the cold water, letting it run a minute, before filling the glass.  He opened another cupboard, retrieving a prescription bottle.  He opened it, shaking two pills into his hand.  He put the lid back on, and returned the bottle to the cupboard.

J.F. admired Jonathan’s bubble butt and well-muscled shoulders and back.  Jonathan turned around and met his eyes.  He smiled, and said, “I’ll see you in the morning.”

J.F. said, “Thank you for the fantasy material.”

Jonathan laughed.  “I’m glad to be of service.”

He padded back up the stairs, and entered their room.  Peyton looked up, as Jonathan turned, sat the glass on the nightstand and turned on the lamp.  Peyton covered his eyes with his hand.  “Here’s your meds, Babe.”

Peyton sat up, taking the pills and the glass of water from his husband.  He tossed the pills in his mouth, and drank enough water to wash the pills down his throat.  “Thanks, Babe.”

Jonathan took the glass from Peyton’s hand, and sat it on the table.  He shut off the light.  He climbed into bed, taking Peyton into his arms. 

“It’s okay, Peyton,” he said, gently rubbing Peyton’s back.   Peyton’s trembling gradually subsided, as the medicine helped him relax.  He drifted off to sleep, feeling safe and warm in Jonathan’s arms.

*** ***

J.F. sat at the kitchen table after Jonathan left, thinking he needed to stop feeling sorry for himself, after hearing about his friends’ stories.  It was comforting to him to know that J.M.’s roommates not only were gay, they also understood what he was going through.  For the first time, he really felt there were people in the world he could relate to, who had similar life experiences.  He didn’t feel so alone, as he had for so long, despite Henri’s constant love. 

His therapist didn’t really understand the trauma he had suffered.  He helped J.F. learn coping mechanisms, but he just didn’t get it.  As much as Henri wanted to understand, he didn’t get it, either.  Meeting J.M.’s roommates and hearing of their experiences convinced him he could beat the depression that sapped his strength and his will to live.  Watching them interact with their spouses, J.F. learned they had successfully been able to form a close bond with another individual.  J.F. had been trying to remain close to his boyfriend, but he just couldn’t seem to keep from retreating from the world, including Henri.

J.F. decided he wanted to have what his friends had – a loving marriage to a wonderful husband.  He knew it would be hard work for him, but he was determined to make things work between him and Henri.  He stood up from the table, feeling much better.  His decision gave him hope and a reason to fight back, to live his life the way he wanted it to be.  He climbed the stairs, and entered the bedroom where his cousin and his boyfriend were still sleeping.  He walked, quietly, over to the bed and climbed in beside Henri.  Henri automatically reached for J.F., pulling him close.  J.F. drifted off to sleep, with his head on Henri’s chest.

*** ***

The next day, J.F. woke up to find he was alone in bed.  He looked over to see that J.M. was also gone.  He wondered what time it was.  He rolled out of bed, and walked over to pick up his cell phone off of the dresser.  He looked at it, in surprise.  It was nearly one in the afternoon.  He had slept nearly 12 hours.

He stretched and yawned, widely.  He walked into the en suite, and looked at himself in the mirror.  He noted that the big black circles around his eyes had receded significantly.  It had been weeks since he had been able sleep through the night.  He felt like a huge burden had been lifted off of his shoulders.  He quickly showered and dressed for the day.  He walked down the stairs and entered the kitchen, where he found Justin seated at the kitchen table.

Justin looked up from the book he was reading, and said, “Good afternoon, J.F.”

J.F. smiled.  “Hey, where is everyone?”

“They went out for pizza.  I volunteered to stay behind, and wait for you to wake up.  I figured we could use the time to talk,” Justin said.  He stood up, and walked over to the fridge, pulling out a ham and turkey sandwich and some milk.  He brought them to the table.  “I made you a sandwich, when I heard you get into the shower.  I’ve already eaten, since I didn’t know when you would wake up.”

J.F. said, “Thank you.”

Justin walked over and retrieved a glass for the milk, and turned to hand it to J.F.  “You’re welcome.”

J.F. said, “I’d like to say grace.”

Justin sat down and joined hands with J.F.  When J.F. finished, Justin asked, “How are you feeling?”

J.F. replied, “I’m much better than I was yesterday.  Thank you for sharing your experiences with me.  I feel honored you would trouble yourself to relive those memories, in order to help me get a grip on myself.”  He took bite of the sandwich, and said, “Hmm….this is good.”

Justin said, “I’m glad you like it.  I’m happy our experiences have helped you to understand that you’re not alone, and we know what you’re going through.”

J.F. nodded his head, as he chewed another bite of his sandwich.  He swallowed and took a drink of cold milk.  “You guys are so awesome!  I never imagined I would meet anyone I could use as a role model, until I met you guys.”

“What about Henri?” Justin asked, with raised eyebrows.

“Henri is wonderful and I love him very much, but he doesn’t get it, sometimes.  You, Greg and Cory know what it’s like to be beaten for being gay.  You know the impact it has on a person, both mentally and emotionally.  I’ve watched how you guys have been able to cope with what happened to you.  I want Henri and I to have what you guys have.”

“What is it you think we have?” Justin asked.

“You guys have loving and caring relationships with your spouses.  You have managed to overcome the fear and the paralyzing depression that comes from being the victim of abuse,” J.F. said.  He saw Justin’s doubtful look, and paused.  “At least, it appears that way.”

Justin said, “We have come a long ways; but, don’t be fooled into thinking everything has magically returned to the way it was before Alex started abusing me.  As for Greg and Cory, they have rough days, just as I do.”

J.F. said, “I didn’t mean to imply things were back to normal, but you guys have managed to have meaningful relationships with your husbands.  I’m so afraid of letting Henri get close to me.”

Justin said, “Don’t drive Henri away, J.F.  He loves you very much.”

J.F. said, “I know.  That’s why I agreed to marry him.  I’m afraid I’m too broken to be a husband for him.”

“You’re not broken, J.F.  You’re just bruised a little,” Justin said, looking deeply into his eyes.  “I can sense you’re much stronger than you think.  Don’t let your fears keep you from having a wonderful marriage and a great family with the one you love.” 

He paused, rubbing his chin.  He wondered if he dared share his deepest spiritual experiences.  He knew how most gay guys felt about God and religion; but, despite his own negative experiences, he had a deep abiding faith in God. 

He decided to risk offending J.F., and asked, “Are you religious?”

J.F. looked at Justin, wondering where this question was going.  “I was raised Catholic.  I still go to mass with my mother every Sunday.  Mom is religious, but she accepts me for who I am.”

“After my parents disowned me, I was angry with God.  I blamed Him for my parents’ actions, as well as my brother’s.  I stayed as far away from anything religious for a long time.  While I lived with Alex, I started to read the Bible, again.  I was convinced that being beaten by Alex was God’s way of punishing me for being gay.  Alex had me convinced that it was all my fault that he was gay, and that I deserved to be beaten.”

“So, how did reading the Bible help you?  Didn’t it just make you feel worse about yourself?” J.F. asked.

Justin shook his head.  “It helped me to remember how I felt when I was younger.  I was 14 when I did something I’m not proud of, and I felt a lot of remorse.  I mean I really felt bad.  My parents had taught me to pray to God for forgiveness of my sins.  So, one night, I got down on my knees to pray.   I really poured out my soul to God in heartfelt prayer, asking for his forgiveness.  After a while, I heard a voice say, ‘I forgive you, my son.’  I’ve never felt as happy as I did that night, knowing God had answered my prayer.  I learned that night that there was a God and He knew who I was.”

J.F. looked intently at Justin’s face.  He could see the tears in his eyes and heard the sincerity in his voice.  “So, if you really knew that God was aware of you, why did you think he was punishing you?”

Justin said, “I had been taught all of my life that being a homosexual was an abomination in the sight of God.   My father often expounded on the scriptures that seemed to condemn homosexuality.  I was totally convinced I was damned for having sex with a guy.  I was so convinced of it, I felt Alex was justified in beating me.”

“I kind of feel that way, too.  The Catholic Church teaches much the same things about gays as the Baptist Church,” J.F. said.   “I’ve struggled with how they view gays.”

“My parents taught me that we are all children of God, and he loves each of us.   They also taught us there isn’t a single person who doesn’t commit sin.  Dad used to say we were all sinners in God’s eyes, but He loves us anyway,” Justin said.  “After I moved here to live with the guys, I was at a point where I felt I wasn’t of any value to anyone.  I attempted to hang myself, when Glenn found me.  He helped me down, and the guys got me the help I needed.  But, I still felt that God hated me.  One evening, Glenn came to my room to check on me, and we had a great talk, that night.  He reminded me that nearly all religions teach that we are the children of God.  Glenn challenged me to seek out God to get an answer of my own; to find out if God loved me.”

Justin choked up, and couldn’t speak.  J.F. waited until he had his emotions under control.  “What did you do?”

“After Glenn left my room, I got on my knees and begged God to let me know if he loved me.  I didn’t expect an answer, because I knew God hated me.  I was totally overwhelmed, when I heard His voice, ‘I love you, my son.’  I had a feeling of peace come over me, and I knew that I God valued me; and, even though I might not be perfect, He still loves me.”

J.F. had tears in his eyes, as Justin finished speaking.  “Do you really believe God loves us?”

“I do.  I talked to the pastor at our church, and he confirmed that God loves us all.  He counseled me to forgive Alex and to forgive myself.  He said that was the only way I would truly begin to heal,” Justin said.  “It has taken me a long time to forgive Alex for what he did to me, but I’m finally there, I think.  I’ve written to Alex, telling him that I forgive him, and I want him to lead a happy life.” Justin said.

“What did Brian say to that?” J.F. asked.

“He wasn’t happy about it, but I’ve felt so much better, since then.  I don’t have to worry about that, anymore.  But most of all, I feel like I can love who I am, now.  I couldn’t do that, before,” Justin said.

J.F. said, “My therapist is working with me on my self-esteem issues.  She says most of my problems stem from my own religious beliefs.  She has been encouraging me to rethink some of those things.”

Justin said, “I know how hard that is.  Glenn was the one who helped me to get back to basics, and to remember that I’m a child of God, just like you are.”

J.F. finished his sandwich, and said, “Thank you for the food, and the encouragement.  My week here has been a huge blessing in my life.  I’ve been very depressed for weeks.”

Justin said, “Both J.M. and Henri hinted at that.”

J.F. met Justin’s eyes.  “I know Henri has been very worried about me.”

Justin said, “Let him take care of you, J.F.  I’ve learned to let my husband take care of me, as well as my friends.  I’ve learned to trust them.  You must learn to do the same.”

J.F.’s eyes were bright with tears.  “I know I need to learn to trust Henri, but I’m afraid to let anyone get close to me.”

Justin nodded his head.  “I understand that part.  I had some pretty high walls built around myself, after Alex was put in jail.  I didn’t dare trust anyone.  Susan and her sons were great friends, but I couldn’t let them into my inner-sanctum, so to speak.”

J.F. asked, “How did you manage to break down the barriers you had built around yourself?”

“I had two very persistent teenage boys that wouldn’t leave me alone,” Justin said, smiling at the memory.  “Adam and Robbie had to be the horniest guys around, and they wanted sex every minute of the day and night.  Their desire for me was like balm on a wound.  The most important thing to me was that their lust for my body was coupled with an even greater love for me as a person.  They knew exactly what I needed, and when I needed it.”

“Henri told me last night that he wants to do for me what the guys have done for you,” J.F. said.

Justin smiled, and said, “Then, I think you should let him.”

J.F. nodded his head.  “I’ll try.”

“Do more than try, Jean-Francois.  It’s going to require everything you’ve got, so you can’t just give it a try,” Justin said.

J.F. held Justin’s gaze, and said, “I’ll do more than try, Justin.”

“Good, because I intend to hold you to it.  I expect a phone call every day from you to report how you’re doing,” Justin said.

J.F. looked at him in surprise.  “Do you really expect me to call you every day?”

“Yes, I do,” Justin said, seriously.  “I want a report every single day, no exceptions.”

“You’re beginning to sound like my mother,” J.F. complained.

“I’m not your mother, but I expect an honest accounting of how you’re doing, each and every day,” Justin said.  “I want you to evaluate yourself, and provide me with a brief synopsis of what you did during the day to strengthen your relationship with Henri, as well as how you’re working to maintain a positive attitude toward life.”

“Is that what you do?” he asked.

“Yes, I do.  I report to Adam and Robbie.  They are my guardian angels.  That’s what I call them,” Justin said.

“So, you’re offering to be my guardian angel?” J.F. said.

“Yes, I am; however, I won’t be the same kind of guardian angel they have been for me.  Their guardianship included a fantastic sexual relationship.  Unfortunately, I won’t be able to provide you with that kind of physical support, but you have Henri for that part,” Justin said.

J.F. looked disappointed.  “But I thought you were still intimate with them.”

Justin shook his head.  “We’re not physically intimate, anymore.  Brian has taken over that part of their guardianship.  We tried the foursome thing a couple of times, but we’ve found it works better for us to maintain a monogamous relationship with our spouses.”

“Was it because Brian was jealous of them?” J.F. asked.

Justin nodded his head.  “Yes, and he still is, but only to a small degree.  That is why he wants us to move into our own home.”

“How do Robbie and Adam feel about Brian?” J.F. asked.

“They’re okay with him, because he’s my husband.  We lived as a threesome long enough for them to know I will always love them,” Justin said.

“They don’t resent Brian’s jealously?” J.F asked, curiously.

“I didn’t say that,” Justin said, smiling.  “But, they have each other, and I have Brian.”

J.F. said, “Does Brian’s family know he’s married to you?”

“No, they don’t.  Brian’s family owns several different companies in Hyderabad.   Two of them were associated with computer technology:   one is a technical support company for several different companies here in the United States, and the other was developing new applications for different software companies.   The others companies are textile manufacturers – mainly clothing.” 

Justin paused for moment, before continuing, “One of Brian’s gay friends, Vijay, was discovered having sex with his boyfriend by his family’s private investigators.   They tried to have them both murdered.  Brian overheard his father talking with Vijay’s parents about the shame he had brought on the family and that they thought they had no choice but to hire someone to kill them.   His father had agreed, and said he would do the same if he ever found out he had a gay son in the family.  Brian warned Vijay; so he and his boyfriend were able to escape and move to England.  So, as you can imagine, he has never told them about me.  He’s afraid they would not only disown him but they would send someone to murder us.”

“That’s pretty serious stuff,” J.F. said.

Justin said, “It’s pretty sobering, to think his parents would hire an assassin to kill us.  They are filthy rich and can pretty much do as they please.  They keep pressuring Brian to return home, but he won’t, as long as we’re married.”

J.F. asked, “Aren’t you afraid that Brian will up and leave you someday?”

Justin shook his head.  “To be honest, I’ve never given it a thought.  I believe Brian loves me enough that he would never leave me; but, one never knows what will happen in the future.  It is one of those things I prefer not to think about.  It’s how I manage to cope, J.F.  I don’t worry about things that may or may not happen.  Otherwise, I would be a basket case.”

J.F. nodded his head, in understanding.  “I can see, now, how you keep your focus on the present, so you don’t get overwhelmed by all that could happen.  I have an overactive imagination, and it gets me all worked up, because I start to worry about things that will never happen.”

They heard the guys returning from getting pizza.  Henri was the first one to enter the kitchen.  He smiled, when he saw his boyfriend.  He walked over to J.F., and pulled him to his feet, and into his arms.

“I missed you, J.F.  I hope you’re not mad at me for leaving you with Justin,” Henri said, worry creasing his brow.

J.F. kissed him, and said, reassuringly, “It’s okay, Henri.  I enjoyed talking with Justin.  I’m glad you went out with the boys.”

Henri smiled, relieved that J.F. wasn’t upset with him.  He felt this week with Jean-Michael and his roommates had been the best thing they could’ve done to get J.F. back on the road to recovery.  He released J.F., just as the rest of the guys appeared in the kitchen.

Brian immediately went over to Justin.  “Are you okay, Babe?”

Justin took Brian’s hand in his, and said, “I’m fine.”

J.F. said, “Brian, thank you for letting Justin stay behind with me.”

Brian looked over at J.F., and smiled.  “Justin said he needed to talk to you, alone.”

Justin said, “Thank you, Babe.  We had a good discussion.”

J.F. said, “Thank you for letting him be my therapist these last few days.”

Henri took J.F.’s hand in his, and looked around.  “J.F. and I would like to move in with you guys, if everyone is okay with that.”

J.M. said, “You guys could room with me, if you don’t mind the cramped quarters.”

Robbie and Adam looked at Justin and Brian.  Brian said, “I’m good with that, because Justin has promised to move into a home of our own by the end of summer.   Then, you guys could have our room.”

Greg said, “I’m good with that.   It would mean we wouldn’t have to find new roommates when Brian and Justin move out.”

Robbie spoke up, “I’m afraid you would still need to find new roommates, because Adam and I are going to move to Toronto at the end of this semester.”

“What will you do about school?” Greg asked.

“We’ve already applied for admission to the University of Toronto,” Adam said.  “We’ll stay with Zach and Todd, until the lease is up on our house.  Then, we’ll live next door to them.”

Cory asked, “Then, who will take your place?”

Robbie shrugged.  “We don’t know, but I’m sure we’ll be able to find some really cool guys to take our place.”

Brian said, “I think we can put the word out with the guys from the gay men’s chorus.”

Justin said, “I already have someone in mind.”

Brian looked at his husband, and asked, “Who?”

“Mihail Velev,” Justin said.  “He’s from Bulgaria.”

Brian grinned.  “He’s really hot, and he’s on the swim team.”

J.M. asked, “Is he single?”

Justin laughed.  “Yes, J.M., he’s single.”

J.M. asked, “Can you introduce me to him?”

Justin said, “Sure, but you have to agree to audition for the gay men’s chorus.”

J.M. looked at Justin in surprise.  “I’ve never thought about singing.”

“Do you know how to sing?” Brian asked.

“Yes, I was in the choir in high school,” J.M. said.

“Well, then, it’s settled,” Justin said.  “We’ll introduce you to him next week.  The auditions are at the Hennepin Avenue Methodist Church.”

J.M. grinned.  “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet,” Justin said, laughing at J.M. excitement.
They spent the rest of the afternoon talking about their plans for the next few months.

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Our Band of Brothers Chapter Two - Justin Cardin Sandrithani


Our Band of Brothers Chapter Two – Justin Cardin Sandrithani

Jean-Michael lay on his bed thinking about his roommates.   He felt very lucky to be living with them.   He remembered when he had first met Coach Dodd, it had been at one of his high school hockey games.   There had been several recruiters in the stands that night, and a couple of them had approached him, with offers of scholarships.   So, when Coach Dodd offered him a scholarship to play for the Gophers, he wasn’t sure he wanted to play hockey for the University of Minnesota-Twin Cities, since he already had better offers, elsewhere.   However, Coach Dodd had managed to persuade him to at least visit the campus, before making up his mind which school to attend.

His mind went back to that moment:

*** ***

Coach Dodd stood up in front of the team, and said, “I’d like to introduce Jean-Michael Gagnon.   He is thinking of playing for us next year.   Please make him welcome.”

After everyone had welcomed him, Zach and Todd had come up to him.   Zach put his hand out, “Hey!   I’m Zach, and this is my husband, Todd.”

Jean-Michael’s mouth fell open in surprise.   He stood there, staring at them.   He couldn’t believe that the big and brawny hockey players standing in front of him had just introduced themselves as being husbands.  

When, Jean-Michael didn’t take his hand, Zach raised his hand to Jean-Michaels chin, gently closing his mouth.

At Zach’s light touch, Jean-Michael seemed to awaken from his trance.   “Did you just say he is your husband?”

Zach laughed, and said, “Yes, I did.”

“How can you be gay, and be on the hockey team?” Jean-Michael asked, incredulously.

Todd smiled at the young man.   “We are both on the hockey team, and we were married in Thunder Bay.   Both of our teams came to our wedding.”

Jean-Michael said, in wonder, “I’ve never heard of such a thing.”

Todd said, “You’re gay, aren’t you, Jean-Michael?”

Todd’s assertion that he was gay scared him.   He looked around to see if anyone had overheard their conversation.

Seeing his discomfort, Zach said, “You don’t need to hide the fact that you’re gay, here.   Todd and I live with several gay couples.   Why don’t you come over to the house to meet them after you’ve toured the campus with your parents?”

Jean-Michael looked over at his parents.   They were talking with Coach Dodd.   “I haven’t come out to my parents yet.”

Todd said, “We understand.   Maybe we could convince your parents to let you come with us to meet some of our friends, while they relax at the hotel.   We’re moving to Toronto this summer, so there will be an opening for you at our place, if you decide you want to go to school here.”

Jean-Michael smiled.   “I like you guys, already.   I’ll tell them that you’ve invited over to see your place, and that I could rent a room there, instead of living on campus.”

Zach said, “We’ll talk to Coach Dodd about it, too.”  Zach put his arm around his shoulders.   “Jean-Michael, just let us take care of you.   You have nothing to worry about.”

He smiled at Zach, and said, “Please call me J.M.”

Todd said, “Okay, J.M., let’s take you on a tour of the campus.”

J.M. looked over at this parents.   “What about my parents?”

“What about them?” Todd asked.

He asked, “Don’t they have to go with me?”

“No, they don’t,” Zach responded.  

“They’re adults, and can fend for themselves, J.M,” Todd said.   “Let’s go.   Besides, they can always text you, if they want to know where you are.”

J.M. liked the way Zach and Todd made him feel.   For the first time in his life, he felt like he could be himself.   It felt very liberating, not to worry about looking at someone or saying something that would give away the fact that he liked guys.

*** ***

His mind was brought back to the present by the ringing of his cell phone.   He picked it up off the night table, and looked to see who was calling.

He answered it, in French.   “Hey, J.F.!

“J.M., are we still on for next week?   I’m getting really excited to come visit you in Minneapolis.”

“Yes, we’re still planning to have you stay with us,” J.M. said.   “I’ve got two new roommates who just moved in.   They are really cool, J.F.   I think you'll like them.”

J.F. said, “If they’re friends of yours, I’m sure I’ll like them.”

They chatted for a few more minutes, before ending their call.

J.M. was a little worried about his cousin.  Even though, J.F. was a year older, he had always felt like J.F.’s big brother.   J.M. had always been physically bigger than J.F.   J.F. had come out as gay when he was 14 years old, and had been harassed constantly by their classmates.   J.M. had stood up for J.F. and threatened them with physical violence if they didn’t stop.   Since that time, he had been J.F.’s protector.

J.F. had been through so much over the past year, since the police had attacked him outside a gay bar in Trois Rivieres.  J.M. started crying, because he had caused J.F.’s suffering.   If only he had been there to protect J.F.   There was a light knock at the door, and J.M. quickly wiped his tears away with the back of his hand, and said, “Come in.”

 The door opened, and Justin came into the room.   He looked at J.M. and walked over to sit on the bed next to him.   He didn’t say a word, but put his arms around J.M., holding him tight.

J.M. buried his face in Justin’s chest, soaking his shirt with his tears.   When the storm had subsided, Justin asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”

J.M. pulled back, and nodded his head.   “I feel so guilty, Justin.   I let my cousin down.   I should have been there to protect him, and I wasn’t”

Justin looked puzzled, and asked, “What happened?”

He said, “My cousin, Jean-Francois, asked me to go with him to a gay bar in Trois Rivieres.   J.F.’s boyfriend works there, so we can get in, even though we aren’t old enough.  But I had hockey practice the next morning; so, I didn’t want to go.  J.F. wanted to be with his boyfriend, so he went by himself.   That night, after he left the bar, four cops attacked J.F., calling him a faggot.   They said they were going to teach him a lesson.   The entire attack was caught on a security camera, plus on several cell phones of bystanders.”

Justin was shocked at what he was hearing.   “I thought things we’re so much better for gays in Canada.   I mean Canadians seem so much more civilized than we are here.   But, I guess police brutality is universal, whether it’s here or in Canada.”

J.M. said, “You’re right about that.   But, at least, the four policemen involved in the beating incident were suspended without pay and face seven charges, including assault with a weapon, assault causing bodily harm, negligent use of a firearm, fabricating police reports and obstruction of justice.  The four of them have been sentenced to the maximum jail time for their heinous crimes.”

Justin said, “I’m glad they won’t be out on the streets for a very long time.   It’s nice to see that the Canadian justice system works.   Those rogue police officers were charged and put in prison, instead of getting away with assaulting your cousin.   Here, in the United States, the cops get away with murder, assault, you name it, because they can claim that you were resisting arrest; so, their use of force is justified.   The police believe they are above the law, and can do as they please, because they are never held accountable for their actions.”

J.M. said, “I’ve heard that about your country, but aren’t there organizations out there that monitor police abuses?”

Justin said, “Yes, there are, but they are constantly harassed and labeled as terrorist organizations, because they shine a light on bad cops and their illegal behavior.”

J.M. said, “Isn’t there something we can do to stop police brutality?”

Justin   “Yes, there is.   We can vote out politicians that support and condone such behavior in our law enforcement.   But the best way to stop police brutality is to record the cops’ bad behavior and publish it.   You would be amazed at the impact posting cops bad behavior on the internet has on the community.   It’s like giving antibiotics to someone who has a bacterial infection.   It takes a while to get the police to recognize their bad behavior, but it eventually will cause the public to be so outraged that they have to make changes.”

 Justin asked, “So, back to what happened to your cousin.   Why do you feel you're responsible for what happened to him?”

“I still feel guilty for not being there to protect him.   I can’t help thinking that if I had been there, J.F. wouldn’t have been attacked,” J.M. paused, trying to get his emotions under control.   “I still remember getting that call at 3 AM in the morning from Aunt Loren asking us go with her to the hospital.   My Uncle Marcel had died the year before, leaving J.F. and Aunt Loren alone, so whenever she needed anything she always called us.   When we arrived at the hospital, the doctors told us that they didn’t expect J.F. to survive the night.   His attackers had beaten him with their nightsticks, in addition to kicking him and stomping on him after they had handcuffed him.   They had cracked open his skull, broken most of his ribs, puncturing one of his lungs.   One of the officers had stomped on his back, fracturing several of his vertebrae.”

“No wonder those guys are in jail,” Justin said.

“It was fortunate that there were several videos that showed what happened, because the cops tried to cover it up,” Justin said.

“So, how is J.F. doing?” Justin asked.

J.M. wiped the tears from his eyes, and said, “Justin, you won’t believe how many miracles that have happened to J.F. over the last few months.  J.F. has proven all the doctors wrong.   They told us that, if he survived the night, he would be a vegetable, unable to live without life support.   Then they said he would be paralyzed from the waist down.   They were wrong on all counts.   J.F. did make it through the night and recovered enough to testify against his attackers.   He learned to walk again.”

J.M. stopped, and he started to cry, again.   Justin put his arms around him, holding him close.   “It’s okay, J.M.”   Justin brushed his blond hair out of his face, and looked into J.M.’s eyes.   “Is there more?”

J.M. nodded his head.   “Yes, J.F.’s skull healed, he has brain damage that causes him to suffer massive seizures.   He’s on medication to control them; but, now, J.F. will never drive a car or have a job where he could endanger someone, if he had a seizure.  J.F. has tried to commit suicide several times, since the attack, Justin.   He is so depressed all of the time.”

Justin said, “I know about the depression thing.”

J.M. said, “Robbie and Adam said you have been through a lot, but wouldn’t tell me anything.   They said that you would share what you would with me.”

Justin released J.M. from his embrace and stretched out on the bed.   J.M. moved to the head of the bed, leaning against the wall.   Justin rolled onto his side, supporting his head with his hand, and looked up at J.M.   “I’ll tell you a little bit about me, but most of it will have to wait until J.F. is here, because I think that I can help J.F.   But I don’t like talking about what happened to me, so I won’t do it twice.”

J.M. said, “J.F. is the same way.   He doesn’t want to talk about what happened to him.   Aunt Loren told me that he still wakes up screaming in the middle of the night.”

Justin said, “I get that part, too.”   He sat up and said, “Let’s to get something to eat.   I’m starving.”

J.M. laughed.   “It’s after midnight, Justin.”

Justin stood up and turned, to give J.M. a hand up.   “Exactly.”

The two men left J.M.'s room, and went downstairs to the kitchen.   “How did you know that I needed someone to talk to?” J.M. asked.

Justin didn’t answer, at first.   He opened the fridge and pulled out the left over pizza from their dinner.   He looked at J.M., and asked, “Cold pizza?”

J.M. nodded his head.   “Yeah, I like it cold, especially combo pizza.”

Justin grabbed a couple of paper towels from the roll hanging under the cabinet.   He grabbed a couple of slices of pizza and placed them one paper towel, handing it to J.M.   The, he grabbed the remaining two slices for himself.   He opened the fridge and grabbed two cans of beer, handing one to J.M.

J.M. hesitated for a moment, before handing it back.   “I can’t drink this.”

Justin met his eyes, and asked, “Are you sure?  It will help you relax, then maybe you’ll be able to sleep.”

J.M. said, “I’m good, Justin.”

Justin put the beer back in the fridge, and pulled out a can of soda.   He looked at J.M. with his eyebrows raised.   J.M. laughed, and said, “Okay, I’ll take the soda.”

Justin handed it to him.   They walked over to the kitchen table and sat down.   After taking a bite of pizza, Justin said, “I heard you crying, J.M.   That’s how I knew you needed me.”

J.M. said, “But, I thought everyone was asleep.”

Justin said, “I often can’t sleep.   I still have nightmares about what happened to me.   The bad dreams haven’t been as bad since I married Brian, but I still have them.   At least, I don’t wake up screaming, anymore.   I used to wake Brian up every time I had a bad dream; but now, I just get up and wonder around the house until I’m calmed down enough to sleep.   I was just outside your door, when I heard you crying.   Hearing you crying reminded me of the many nights I cried myself to sleep after my parents disowned me.”

J.M. looked into Justin’s eyes, and asked, “What happened?”

A look of great sadness crossed Justin’s face, before he started to speak, “Well, let me start at the beginning, I grew up in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin, about 97 miles (156 km.) from here to the east.”

J.M. nodded his head.   “I think I know where it is.”

“My Dad was an independent truck driver.   He worked for several of the cheese factories near Chippewa Falls, as well as other businesses who needed to ship their goods to their customers.   He developed a good relationship with the smaller cheese makers around the state, and would make a run to pick up their cheese.   He would drive to Ottawa and Montreal to deliver their specialty cheeses.”   He grew more animated as he talked about his childhood.

“Dad would take me and my brother, Jared, with him on his runs to Canada.   We thought it was super cool to go on the road with him!   He had a sleeper cab, where we could take naps, play video games, and hang out, while Dad drove the truck.   Back then, I didn’t have a care in the world.   My brother was my best friend in the entire world.   We did everything together.”

Justin stopped, and drew a ragged breath.   J.M. saw the tears begin to course down his cheeks.   He got up, and walked around the table.   He sat down next to Justin and put his arm around his shoulders.   Justin wiped his tears away with the back of his hand.   “I’m sorry, J.M.   It’s just that, sometimes, I really miss my brother.”

J.M. said, “Why don’t you tell me more about him?”

“Jared is a year older than me.   He is a great sportsman and excels at everything athletic.   He was on our high school basketball team.   He led our team to the state championships his senior year.   I remember sitting in the stands cheering for him, and shouting and yelling so much, that I could hardly speak afterward.  Everyone at the school loved Jared.   Not only was he a great athlete, he was valedictorian of his class.   He got a full ride scholarship to Maranatha Baptist University.   He met his wife there.   He’s married, with two kids and lives near my parents.”

J.M. said, “He sounds like a really nice guy.”

Justin said, “He is, but my parents always compared me to Jared, telling me that I needed to be better at sports, and get better grades, because Jared did so well.  Nothing I did measured up in their eyes.   Jared defended me to them, telling them that it wasn’t fair to me, to be compared to him.   He always treated me as an equal.   What I liked most was the fact that he included me in his circle of friends at school.   I was fifteen, when I realized I liked guys more than girls.   Being around Jared’s friends allowed me to hang with the best looking studs at school!”

J.M. said, “Did Jared know you were gay?”

“No, but I think he suspected that I might be, because I never dated anyone.   He tried to line me up with some of his friends’ sisters, who were my age; but, I always had an excuse why I couldn’t go out with them.”

“Did you play sports?” J.M. asked.   “You look like you’re an athlete.”

Justin nodded.   “I was on the swim team.   I managed to hide the fact I was gay from the team, except from Mitchell.   He was my best friend on the swim team.   He caught me looking him over one evening, after practice.   He waited until everyone had left the showers, before he approached me.”

As Justin told J.M. about Mitchell, his mind went back to his first sexual encounter with him.

*** ***

Justin stood under the shower, rinsing the chlorine out of his swim suit.   He couldn’t resist the temptation to give Mitchell the once over, as he showered a couple of shower heads over from Justin.   Justin’s light blue eyes met Mitchell’s dark brown ones.   Justin blushed, as he realized that Mitchell knew he had been lusting over his body.

Mitchell was 6’2” (188 cm.), and had short, dark brown hair, dark brown eyes, a rather large nose, and a generous mouth.   His olive skin was flawless.   He had no body hair except around his large cock.   Mitchell trimmed his pubic hair so that it wouldn’t show above his bikini swim suit.

As Justin watched, Mitchell’s cock began to inflate until it was at full mast.   Mitchell grinned, and said, “Come here, Justin.”

Justin turned off the water, and joined Mitchell.   Mitchell asked, “You’re gay, aren’t you?”

Justin met his eyes, and nodded his head.   “Please don’t tell anyone, Mitch.   They’ll run me off of the team.”

Mitchell said, “I won’t tell, but you have to let me fuck you.”

Justin grinned.   “I hoped you would say that.”

Mitchell said, “Turn around, and bend over.   I need to fuck you, now.”

Justin did as he was told.   He saw Mitchell pump the soap dispenser a few times, and felt his fingers push into him.   Mitchell repeated the process a couple of more times, then said, “Are you ready?”

Justin nodded his head.   Mitchell lined up his huge cock with Justin’s quivering hole.   Mitchell said, “Relax, Justin.   It will be much easier if you can relax.”

Justin took a couple of deep breaths, and managed to relax, letting Mitchell’s steel pole enter him.   Mitchell wrapped his arms around Justin’s waist, and kissed the back of his neck.   “You feel so good, Justin.   I’ve wanted to fuck you since you first joined the team.”

Justin turned his head, and said, “I’ve felt the same way, but I was afraid you would hate me.”

Mitchell said, “Well, I’m glad we’ve finally figured out that we both wanted to be together.”

Mitchell released Justin, and held onto his hips, as he proceeded to take Justin’s virginity!

*** ***

Justin was brought back to the present, by J.M.’s voice.   “Justin, are you okay?”

The memory of his first time with a guy, had his dick tenting the fabric of his boxer shorts.   He managed to respond.   “Yes, I’m okay.   It’s just that thinking about Mitchell has me all amped up.   I’m going to have to wake up Brian to have him take care of this.”   He pointed to his cock.

J.M. laughed.   “That must have been a great fuck, to get you aroused like that.”

Justin nodded his head, in agreement.   “It was.   We fucked like rabbits the rest of my senior year.   He was my first love.   I stayed at his house when my parents disowned me, until I returned here to go to college.”

J.M. asked, “When did you come out to your parents?”

“It was after I came here to school.   I went home for the weekend the first week of October.   I had phoned Mitchell to tell him I planned to come out to my parents.   He told me to be careful, because my parents are Baptist and deeply religious.   When I came out to them, Dad said I was not a child of his and completely disowned me.   Mom didn’t defend me, but just sat there in silence.   I packed my stuff and haven’t been back.   Even Jared has disowned me.   I haven’t seen or heard from them since that time.”

J.M. said, “That makes me sad, Justin.   You don’t deserve to be treated that way by those that should have been there to love and support you.”

Justin said, “I know, but that is the way things are.   Since then, I’ve worked to pay for my tuition and books; sometimes, taking a semester off to save enough money to go the following semester.   It took me seven years to graduate.”

J.M. said, “I’m impressed that you stuck with it, and managed to graduate, despite the obstacles in your way.”

Justin said, “It wasn’t easy for me, especially after I moved in with Alex.”

J.M. asked, “Who is Alex?”  He felt Justin shiver, and gave him a concerned look.   “Are you okay?”

Justin said, “Let’s talk about Alex another time.”

J.M. said, “Thank you for talking with me.”

Justin smiled, and said, “I’m always good for a nice long chat.”   He leaned over, and kissed J.M. on the lips.  J.M. gave Justin a look of surprise.   Seeing his expression, Justin kissed him again.  

Justin said, “Don’t worry, J.M.   I’m not going to cheat on Brian; but, I couldn’t resist kissing those beautiful lips of yours.”

J.M. blushed, and said, “I’m glad you think I’m good looking.”

Justin said, “Jean-Michael, you are a stud.”   With that, he kissed J.M. once more, then stood up.   “Let’s get to bed.   It’s late.”

J.M. smiled up at him, and said, “Thanks for being my friend."  

Justin ruffled his hair and said, "I'm glad you've moved in with us."

J.M. stood up and followed Justin out of the kitchen, switching off the light as he left.   Later, in his room, he picked up his cell phone to find a text message from J.F.

“Henri veut venir avec moi pour vous rendre visite. C'est bien cela?”  (Henri wants to come with me to visit you.   Is that okay?)

J.M. replied, “Je suis d'accord avec ça, mais je dois demander Zach et Todd.”  (I’m okay with it, but I’ll have to ask Zach and Todd.)

J.M. wasn’t sure he wanted J.F.’s boyfriend to come with him.   Henri hadn’t been able to protect J.F. from the cops, and he felt Henri should have done something to stop it from happening.   He knew he was blaming Henri for something he had no control over, but he still felt Henri should have kept J.F. with him at the bar, instead of sending him home alone.

He stared up at the ceiling, trying to calm down.   He needed to get some sleep, or he would be a total wreck in the morning.

*** ***

The next morning, Peyton woke up in his lover’s arms.   He felt refreshed, and more than a little horny.   He could feel Jonathan’s cock pressing against his leg, and it excited him.   He felt Jonathan’s fingers running through is hair, and smiled.  

He lifted his head from Jonathan’s chest, and met his husband’s eyes.   Jonathan said, “Good morning, my dearest husband.”

Peyton said, “Good morning, Babe.”   He kissed Jonathan, and said, “I want you to fuck me in the shower, this morning.”   He reached down to stroke his husband’s male member.

Jonathan said, “I’m ready.   Let’s go.”

The two lovers got out of bed, and made their way into the en suite.   He turned on the shower, adjusting the temperature.   He turned, and took Peyton’s hand, pulling him under the cascade of warm water.   He held him in his arms, kissing him deeply.   He loved the feel of Peyton’s hard body against his.  

Peyton murmured against Jonathan’s lips, “Fuck me, please.”

Jonathan turned Peyton around, gently pushing on his back until he was leaning against the shower wall.   “Are you ready?”

Peyton nodded his head.   “Now, please.”

Jonathan was more than ready to comply with Peyton’s wishes!

*** ***

A while later, they appeared in the kitchen dressed in matching khaki cargo shorts and black tank tops.   The floor felt cold on their bare feet.   Jonathan said, “I think we need to invest in a pair of slippers.   These floors are freezing.”

Peyton nodded his head.   “It’s not like Atlanta.   Rick and Glenn’s floors were never cold like they are here.”

Greg and Cory were already sitting at the table, eating their breakfast.   “Good morning, guys,” Greg said, smiling at the newlyweds.   They had that glow that comes from having sex with the one you love.

Cory grinned at them, and asked, “How was the shower?”

Jonathan blushed, but answered, “It was wonderful.”

Peyton said, “Jonathan is the best husband ever.”   He leaned over and kissed him.

Greg said, “Have a seat, guys.  There’s plenty of food.”

The two lovers sat down opposite their brothers-in-law.   Peyton asked, “How do you like being a Scarborough?”

Greg said, “Letting Grandpa adopt me was the best decision I’ve ever made.   I’m glad you decided to let him adopt you, as well.”

Cory said, “I second that.   It has been a very good thing for us.”

Jonathan said, “Why do you call him Grandpa?”

“Because that is what Glenn and Rick call him,” Greg said.  “We could call him Dad, because he adopted me.   However, it felt right to me to call him Grandpa.”

Peyton said, “I thought about calling him Grandpa, as well; but, I wanted to find a way to feel closer to him, and calling him Dad seemed to fit the bill.”

Jonathan said, “He seemed pleased that we’re calling him Dad.”

Cory said, “I also think that it puts you on equal footing with Bob and Corey.”

Peyton said, “I guess you’re right about that.   I did feel that I needed to feel I was being treated the same as my new brothers.   I still feel like I don’t really belong to this family.”

Greg said, “That feeling will fade as time goes on, Peyton.  Being adopted really made me feel different.  It was something I needed to help me move past what my biological father did to me.”

“In my case, my father hasn’t done me harm; but, I know he would if he ever found out that I’m married to a guy,” Peyton said.

“True, but you needed a new start, just as much as we did,” Cory said.

Peyton met Cory’s gaze, and nodded his head.  “Yes, I did, and still do.  I’m hoping that Peyton Jeremiah Scarborough Smith can become someone that inspires people to do their best.”

Cory said, “I think you have already become that man, Peyton.   Greg and I already look up to you.   You’ve been able to overcome the fear you had of being intimate with another man.”

Peyton reached over and took Jonathan’s hand.  He smiled, and said, “That’s because I’ve married my best friend.”

Jonathan said, “I love you, Babe.”  He kissed Peyton, lightly on the lips.  “But, Cory is correct.   You’ve already made great strides to become the man you envision yourself to be.”

Peyton’s eyes filled with tears, and he said, “It’s only because you guys insisted on never letting me sleep alone at night.   I learned that I could be close to you guys without being raped.  I needed to know that I was loved for being me, and not just a sex toy to be fucked at will.”

Jonathan took Peyton’s hand in his.  “You are much, much more than a sex toy to me; but, I like the sex part a lot.”

Peyton laughed, and said, “You guys wouldn’t believe how horny Jonathan gets.   He’s a sex maniac!”

Greg said, “I think I can believe it.   Did you guys wait to have sex, until after you were married?”

“Yes, we did,” Jonathan said.   “I wanted our first time to be one our wedding day.”

“We haven’t been able to keep our hands off of each other since that day,” Peyton said.   “I can’t get enough of him.”

Jonathan grinned, and said, “I’m glad I made you wait, because now you appreciate having sex with me.”

Greg asked, “What do you guys want to do today?”

“We want to meet all of your friends,” Peyton said.  “Glenn and Rick have told us that all of your friends are wonderful people.”

Greg said, “Rick and Glenn are right, because every one of the guys is a loyal friend.”

“Plus, they’re all studs.   I love having them around,” Cory said.

Greg nodded his head, and said, “They are great role models, Peyton.   All of them work out, regularly.   They know how to treat their spouses, because they're madly in love with their husbands.”

Robbie and Adam walked into the kitchen.   Robbie asked, “Did someone say I was madly in love with my husband?”   He kissed Adam, and led him over to the table.   The two young guys sat down next to Peyton and Jonathan.

Peyton smiled at them, and said, “Rick and Glenn warned us to watch out for you, Robbie.”

Robbie gave Peyton his “who me” look, then broke into laughter.   “They know me too well.”

Greg said, “Robbie is our resident practical joker.   There is never a dull moment around this place.”

Robbie stuck his tongue out at Greg.   “Tattle tale!”

Greg laughed, and said, “Robbie, you know it’s true.   Besides, you should never stick out your tongue around here, because you know we’ll collect on the invitation to kiss you.”   He got up and walked round the table to where Robbie was seated.   He took Robbie’s hand and pulled him to his feet.   He embraced Robbie, kissing him deeply.  He released Robbie, and turned to return to his place next to Cory.

Robbie grinned, and sat down.  “I love living here.”

Adam laughed, and said, “You’re incorrigible, Robbie.”

Robbie said, “But, you love me, anyway.”

Adams leaned over, and kissed his husband.  “Yes, I do.”

Robbie glanced at his watch, and said, “We’ve got 15 minutes before we have to leave for class.”

Handing Robbie a plate of eggs and sausage, Adam said, “Here, start eating.”

Robbie obediently took his food, and dug into it.   The two wolfed down their breakfast.   Peyton laughed, and said, “You guys are crazy!”

“No, they’re just the youngest ones in the house,” Greg said, smiling at his friends.

Robbie said, with a grin, “It’s true.   You guys are all getting so old.”

Greg said, “You guys aren’t teenagers, anymore, so you can’t give us a hard time about being in our twenties.”

Adam said, “Don’t encourage him, Greg.   You know how Robbie likes a challenge.”

Robbie stood up, and walked over to the sink.   He washed his dishes, and turned to take Adam’s dishes from him.   He quickly washed them up, and placed them in the drain board to dry alongside his own.

“We’ll see you guys after class,” Robbie said.   Adam and Robbie left the kitchen, and, soon, the guys heard them open and close the front door.

Greg said, “Let’s clean up.   Brian and Justin will be down in about 30 minutes, to go to work.”

Peyton asked, “What about Jean-Michael?”

Greg said, “He goes to class with us.   Our first class is at 10 AM, so we won’t see him for a while yet.”

The guys cleaned the kitchen, and moved into the recreation room to relax until it was time to leave for class.   As predicted, Jean-Michael showed up 30 minutes later.   He walked into the recreation room, and looked at the guys, and said, “Good morning.”

“Good morning, J.M.,” Greg said.   “There’s some eggs and sausage in the warmer in the kitchen.”

“Thanks, Greg.   I’ll be right back,” he said.   He left the room, and returned a few minutes later with his plate of eggs and sausage.   He sat down in an armchair, and proceeded to make his breakfast disappear.

He finished, and put his plate down on the floor next to the chair.   “Guys, I needed to ask you if it’s okay for my cousin, J.F., to bring his boyfriend with him next week.”

Greg said, “I’m good with that.”   He glanced over at Cory, who nodded his head.  

“I’m okay with it, as well.”

J.M. looked over at Peyton and Jonathan.   Peyton said, “It’s fine by me.”

“Same here,” Jonathan said.   “What’s his boyfriend like?”

J.M. said, “He’s really good looking.   He’s tall, blond and really built.   I’d say he’s got the perfect body.”

Peyton asked, “But, you don’t approve of him?”

J.M. didn’t respond at first, then said, “I approve of him, but I still blame him, in part, for what happened to J.F.   He shouldn’t have sent J.F. home by himself.”

Greg said, “Jean-Michael, you need to stop blaming him for what happened.   He didn’t know that those cops were going to attack J.F.”

It was obvious to Peyton and Jonathan that there had been previous discussions about this subject.   J.M. said, “I know, but I still can’t get it out of my head that there was something we could’ve done to prevent it from happening.   I blame myself for letting him go alone to that gay bar.”

Peyton said, “Can you bring us up to date with what happened to J.F.?”

J.M. said, “I’m sorry.   I keep forgetting that you don’t know what happened to J.F.”  He related the entire story to them.   “I think I told everyone, now, except Brian.”

Brian walked into the room, and asked, “What haven’t you told me?”

 Peyton gave Brian a once over, noting his olive skin, black hair and eyes.   He wore a white muscle shirt and tight-fitting jeans that hugged him in all of the right places.   Brian smiled, and said, “Good morning, guys.”

J.M. said, “I was telling the guys about my cousin, J.F.”

Brian turned to look at J.M.   “Justin told me about your cousin, this morning.”

Justin walked up behind his husband, and wrapped his arms around his waist.   “I hope it was okay to share what you told me with Brian.”

J.M. said, “I was going to tell him, but now I don’t have to repeat myself.   J.F. sent me a text message last night asking if he could bring his boyfriend with him next week.”

Justin kissed the back of Brian’s neck, and released him.   “It’s okay with me.   Brian?”

Brian said, “As long as he doesn’t try to hit on any us, I’m good with him visiting with us.”

J.M. laughed, and said, “I don’t think Henri would dare try something like that.   J.F. has him on a pretty short leash.”

“Is that why J.F. wants to bring him?” Peyton asked.

J.M. nodded his head.   “J.F. is super possessive.   I keep telling him that he needs to relax.   I’m afraid Henri will tire of it, and leave him.   Since the attack, J.F. has been exceptionally clingy.   He’s very afraid of being alone.”

Justin said, “I can understand that.   Go ahead and tell him to bring Henri.”

J.M. said, “There’s breakfast in the warmer.   I made sure to leave enough for you guys.”

Justin smiled, and said, “Thanks, Jean-Michael.”   He took Brian’s hand, and led him to the kitchen.   Justin grabbed the sausage and eggs from the warmer and sat them on the table, while Brian retrieved cups, plates and utensils.   Justin walked over to the fridge to retrieve the orange juice.

He joined Brian at the kitchen table, and the guys finished off the sausages and eggs.   Brian said, “I want to start looking for house in Mark and Brandon’s neighborhood.”

Justin said, “We can look, but I don’t want to move until July or August.   I want to make sure the guys are settled before we move out.”  Brian frowned, and muttered oaths under his breath.   Justin said, “I won’t change my mind, Brian; so, just stop the cursing and deal with it.”

Brian met his husband’s eyes, and said, “Justin, I want you to put us first.   We need to be on our own.   Don’t you think we’ve been here long enough?”  Justin’s pressed his lips together in a thin line.   Seeing Justin’s expression harden, Brian said, “I’m sorry, I know we discussed this many times before.”

Justin let out a sigh of resignation.  He wasn’t sure he was ready to abandon the safety and comfort he had felt living with the guys.   He loved Brian very much, but sometimes Brian didn’t know what to do to help him with his fits of depression.   Even Brian acknowledged that living with the guys had been a huge blessing in their lives.   It was just that Brian felt that they needed to move on with their lives; and, to Brian, that meant moving into a home of their own.  “Brian, I promise we can move in the summer.   In the meantime, I’ll go with you to look at houses.”

Brian smiled at his husband, and said, “Thank you, Babe.”  

He leaned over and kissed Justin, placing his hand on the inside of his thigh.   Brian knew he had just won a minor victory; but, he also knew that he needed to tread lightly, or things could blow up in his face.   If he pushed too hard, Justin would shut down, or, worse, do a death spiral into a deep depression.   Justin had attempted suicide several times, since they had gotten married.   The first time it happened, they had had an argument.   The next day, they had kissed and made up, at least that is how Brian perceived the situation.   He discovered just how wrong he was when he walked into their en suite to find Justin on the floor in a pool of his own blood.   He had never forgiven himself for causing Justin so much mental and emotional suffering.   It had taken months for Justin to return to normal; and, even at that, Brian kept a close eye on Justin, not knowing if another suicide attempt was just an hour away.

Brian was brought back to the present, when Justin asked, “What’s wrong?”

Brian said, “Nothing, sweetheart.”  He gave Justin’s thigh a gentle squeeze, and picked up his cup of orange juice, finishing off the last of it.

Justin knew that something was bothering Brian, but he didn’t press him.   He knew that Brian would tell him, eventually.   Justin stood up, and helped Brian wash up their dishes.   He pulled Brian into his embrace, and looked him in the eyes.   “I love you.”

Brian said, “I love you, too.”

Justin kissed him deeply, before releasing him.   “It’s time to go.”

As they grabbed their coats, and walked out the door, Justin thought about Brian’s propensity to be over-protective of him.   They had argued about it before, but Brian hadn’t backed off of his insistence that Justin needed to be shielded from things that would upset him.  He smiled as he thought of his husband’s sense of responsibility for his well-being.   It gave him a sense of comfort, despite the occasional chafing he felt at being watched over.  

*** ***

The week flew by for Jean-Michael.   He borrowed Robbie and Adam's car to drive to the airport to meet Jean-Francois and Henri.   He parked the car, and walked inside the terminal.  

His cell phone rang, and he answered it.   “Hey!”

“We’re picking up our luggage,” J.F. said.

“I see you,” J.M. said, waving at his cousin.

He ended the call, and walked over to J.F.   He pulled him into a warm embrace, and kissed him on both cheeks.   “I’m glad you came.”

J.F. clung to J.M. for a moment longer, before releasing him.   J.M. turned to Henri, who stood waiting, patiently, as the two cousins greeted each other.   J.F. was 5’8” with dark brown hair, dark brown eyes, a button nose, and a small mouth.   He had a round boyish-looking face, except that now he had huge black circles around his eyes.   He looked like he hadn’t slept in days.   He was very thin and emaciated.

J.M. looked at his cousin with concern in his eyes.   “You’re too skinny, J.F.   Aren’t you eating right?”

J.F. looked away from his cousin’s gaze.   He mumbled, “I don’t like to eat.”

J.M. frowned, and said, “I can tell you aren’t sleeping, either.”

Henri said, “He has insomnia, J.M., but he won’t take his sleeping pills.”

J.M. said, “J.F. we’ll talk more about this later.”  J.M. turned to Henri.   He hugged him and kissed him on both cheeks.   “Welcome to Minneapolis, Henri.

Henri said, “Thank you, J.M.   I’m glad your roommates agreed to let me come.”

J.M. gave Henri the once over.   Henri was same height as J.M.; but, there the similarities ended.   Henri had jet black hair, black eyes, a hawk-like nose, a bushy black mustache, and a square jaw.   He was a mountain of a man with broad shoulders and a barrel chest.   He reminded J.M. of a bull, ready to charge.

J.M. said, “If you’ve got all of your luggage, let’s go.”

Henri said, “I have it all here.”

J.M. led the way back to the car.   They loaded their luggage into the trunk, and climbed in.   J.M. pointed out things of interest as they made the short drive to the guys’ house.   He pulled the car alongside the curb, and parked it.

They got out, and retrieved the luggage from the trunk.   As they walked towards the door, it opened and Robbie game bouncing down the steps.   He had a broad smile on his lips.   “Welcome!”   He took the suitcases out of Henri’s hands.   “Let us help you with those.”  Adam followed him, at a much slower pace.   Robbie turned to hand Adam one of the suitcases.   “Please take this one.”

They turned and went back into the house.   By the time Henri, J.M. and J.F. had entered the house, Robbie and Adam had returned from taking their luggage to their room.

Robbie embraced J.F.   “J.F., I’m so glad you came.”

J.F. kissed Robbie on both cheeks.  J.F. said, “Thank you for letting us come to visit.”

Robbie turned to Henri.   He put his arms around Henri’s waist, and leaned up to kiss Henri on the lips.  “Welcome to our home, Henri.”

Henri grinned, and said, “I like being here already.”

Robbie released Henri, and said, “Did you need to rest for a bit?   I’ve put your things in J.M.’s room, if you want to freshen up.”

Henri looked over at J.F.   J.F. said, “I’m okay.”

Henri said, “If J.F. is okay, I’m okay.”

“Then, let’s go to the recreation room and relax,” Robbie said.   “The rest of the guys are waiting there to meet you.”

They followed Robbie and Adam into the recreation room.   J.M. made the introductions.   “Henri Girard and Jean-Francois Fortin, this is Greg and Cory Scarborough, Peyton and Jonathan Smith, and Brian and Justin Sandrithani.”

Robbie interrupted him, before he could go on, “I’m Robbie and this is my husband, Adam; but, you’ve already met us.”

Henri smiled, and said, “Yes, we have.”

The guys all acknowledged the introductions with a smile and a nod of the head.   J.F. asked, “Are all of you married?”

Greg said, “Yes, we are.”

J.F. smiled.   “That makes me very happy.   Henri and I are engaged to be married.”

J.M. exclaimed, “Congratulations!   When did Henri propose to you?”

J.F. grinned, and said, “Last night.   He took me to our favorite restaurant in Trois Rivieres.  He proposed to over a glass of champagne after dinner.   He even got on his knees, when he asked me to marry him.”

Cory said, “We’re very happy for you guys.   Please sit down.   We were just planning out our week.”

Henri and J.F. sat down on the loveseat.   Henri put his arm protectively around J.F.’s shoulders, pulling him close.   J.F. snuggled against his fiance.

Justin watched the two of them very closely.   He could see that J.F. was not doing well.   It was obvious that he was in a lot of mental and emotional pain.   He also noted that Henri was deeply in love with J.F.

As they discussed their plans for the week, J.F. dropped off.   Henri said, “I’m taking J.F. up to bed.   J.M. will you show which room is ours?”

Henri picked up the sleeping J.F. in his arms, and followed J.M. out of the room and up the stairs.   J.M. opened the door, and indicated which bed was theirs.   The guys had helped J.M. set up the queen-sized bed in his room for them.   It didn’t leave a lot of room between his bed and theirs, but it was only for a short time.

J.M. pulled back the duvet, and Henri laid J.F. on the bed, covering him with the comforter that lay across the foot of the bed.   J.F. stirred, but didn’t waken.   J.M. and Henri quietly left the room and rejoined the group of guys downstairs.

Justin met Henri’s gaze, and asked, “How long as J.F. been like this?”

Henri glanced over at J.M., who answered his unspoken question, “They already know what happened to J.F.”

Henri nodded his, and looked back at Justin.   “He’s been practically catatonic for nearly two weeks now.   He hasn’t been eating or sleeping much.   I’ve tried to get him to go to the doctor or his therapist, and he won’t go.”

J.M. said, “Why didn’t you call me?”

“J.F. made me promise not to tell you, J.M.   He threatened to leave me, if I said one word to you about his mental and emotional state,” Henri said, tears rolling down the big man’s cheeks.   “Watching him slipping away from me is killing me, Jean-Michael.   You don’t know how hard it’s been on me, to keep that promise.   I proposed to him last night, hoping that it would give him something to live for; but, you can see what a bad state he’s in.”   He put his head in his hands, as sobs wracked his body.

J.M. rubbed Henri’s back, and said, “It’s alright, now, Henri.   We’ll see what we can do to help J.F.”

Henri sat up, and looked at J.M.   He said, in a voice still choked with tears, “I hope you can reach him, Jean-Michael.   I’m afraid I’m going to lose him.”

J.M. knew that Henri loved J.F., but he didn’t realize how deeply until now.   He said, “I’ll do my best.”

Greg said, “I think we all can help.”

Brian looked at Justin, and said, “Okay, you win, Justin.”

Justin smiled, and said, “You love me.”

Brian kissed his husband, and said, “Yes, I do love you, very much.”

Robbie looked at Brian and Justin, and asked, “What’s up?”

Brian said, “I’ve been pushing Justin to go house hunting; but, he agreed to do so, on the condition that we wouldn’t move until this summer, because we need to be here with you guys.   After meeting Henri and J.F., I agree with Justin’s assessment of the situation.   I think that, between Justin, Greg, Cory and Peyton, they have enough experience with the kinds of things J.F. is going through that they should be able to reach him.”

The four men looked at each other and back to Brian.   Justin grinned, and said, “What Brian is trying to say that there isn’t any group of guys better qualified to reach out to J.F. than the four of us.   Each of us have had life experiences that give us a lot of credibility with others who have had similar experiences.”

Adam looked at Robbie, and said, “I think Justin just said that we’re young and inexperienced.”

Justin laughed, and said, “No, you two are experienced, alright, but in different ways.”

Robbie grinned, broadly.   “Yes, you should know.”

Henri looked from Robbie to Justin, wondering what he was missing.   Seeing Henri’s look of confusion.   Justin said, “After I tried to commit suicide, Robbie and Adam made it their mission in life to make me happy.”

Adam put his arm around Robbie’s shoulders, and grinned.  He said, “Justin is the master of understatement.   We made him more than just happy.   I think some of the words he used were – enraptured, enchanted, deliriously euphoric, and fiery passion.   Of course, that was before Brian came into the picture.”

Justin blushed, slightly, but said, “Let’s just say Robbie and Adam practiced their charms on me, and I was a very willing subject.”

Henri smiled, and said, “Maybe they can work their magic on J.F.   You seem to be pretty happy, Justin.”

Justin said, “I am very happy.   I have a wonderful husband, and fantastic friends.”

Greg said, “Glenn calls us his Band of Brothers.   We are very close, and we look out for each other.”

Henri gave Greg a puzzled look, and asked, “Who is Glenn?”

Greg said, “He’s our nephew.”

His look of confusion only deepened.   He asked, “How is that possible?  Are you from a large family?”

Peyton smiled, and said, “Greg and I have been adopted by Glenn’s Grandpa.”   He paused for a moment, before continuing, “And his life partner is my cousin, Rick.”

He looked the rest of the guys, and asked, “Are you related to Glenn, as well.”

Robbie said, “No, but we’re really good friends with Glenn and Rick.”

Justin said, “It’s like all of us are part of the same family.”

Adam said, seriously, “That’s because we are.”  Henri shook his head, trying to understand what the guys were saying.   “Just hang around us for a while, and you’ll start to understand what we mean.”

Henri said, “Okay, but how did you meet Glenn and Rick?”

Robbie said, “Glenn was our roommate while Rick was on active duty.”

Henri looked at Robbie in surprise.   “Rick is in the military?”

Adam got up and walked over to the fireplace.   He picked up a framed photograph of Glenn and Rick.   Rick was in his full dress uniform.   He walked over, and handed the photo to Henri.   “That’s Glenn and Rick.”

Henri whistled.   “Wow!   They are quite the handsome couple.”   He handed the photo back to Adam, who returned it to the mantelpiece.   He picked up the frame next to it.   He handed it to Henri.

“This is our Band of Brothers,” Adam said.   “We had this taken when we went to Spain together.”   He pointed to each of the guys, as he named them.

Henri asked, “How did you manage to find so many great looking gay guys?”

Adam shrugged, “I don’t know.   All I know is that Glenn and Rick seem to make friends with great guys.”

Greg said, “We met Rick, while he was on active duty at Quantico Marine Base, in Virginia.”

Cory said, “Rick helped us earn the rank of Eagle Scout.”

Greg said, “He and my brother-in-law, Joey, kept on us until we managed to finish our Eagle Projects.”

Henri looked at the photograph in his hand.   “So, this guy here is your brother-in-law?”

Greg nodded his head.   “Yes, that's Joey.   My sister was killed in a car accident, leaving Joey alone with my two nieces.   He married Tyler, and they have twin boys, Martin and Rafael.  Our nephews are almost two months old now.   We’re going to meet them in Florida in two weeks, for spring break.”

Henri smiled, and said, “I wish we could go with you.”

Greg said, “Well, you can, if you want to go.   I’m sure we can get you into the same hotel with us.”

Henri shook his head.  “I have to work to support us, since J.F. isn’t working, right now.”

Cory said, “What if we paid for your trip?  Could you go, then?”

Henri looked uncertain.   “I don’t know if I could be away from work that long.”

“Well, you’re going to be here a week, then you’ll be back home for a week, before you would be flying to Florida for a week,” Justin said.

“Why don’t you call your boss, and ask him if it’s okay?” Jonathan said.   “Most employers won’t care, as long as you let them know with enough time to make arrangements for someone to cover for you.”

Henri still looked doubtful.   “I’m sure Pierre will let me go, but how will we pay for our bills?   If I don’t work, I don’t get paid.”

Justin said, “We’ll float you a loan for your expenses.”

Henri said, “I don’t like borrowing money from anyone.   We’re already in debt from all of J.F. medical bills.”

Jonathan said, “I thought the Canadian health care system took care of most of your needs.”

“It covers most of our medical expenses, but J.F. has special needs, some of which aren’t covered,” Henri said.  “J.F.’s mother doesn’t make a lot of money, and can’t really help us.”

Peyton said, “Well, let us think about how to work things out for you.   In the meantime, let’s plan our week with you and J.F.   We just got here ourselves, and haven’t had time to explore the city.”

They spent the next hour or so, planning out their activities.   Afterward, Henri took his leave of them, and went upstairs to check on J.F.   He opened the bedroom door, to see that J.F. was still asleep.   He took off his shoes, and slipped into bed, alongside his boyfriend.   J.F., sensing his presence, snuggled against his body.   He lay awake, thinking about the conversation he had with the guys.   He was glad he had insisted on coming with J.F.  He eventually drifted off to sleep.

*** ***

Half way through their stay, the guys were relaxing in recreation room.   They had been talking about their activities, when the conversation turned to their experiences with coming out to their family and friends.

Robbie said, “I made the mistake of telling my best friend that I’m gay.   I soon found out that he wasn’t a very good friend.   Jake told all of his buddies and pretty soon all of the jocks were harassing me.   Things got so bad, I hated going to school.   When Glenn came to visit, he knew right away that something was wrong.   He encouraged me to talk to my parents about what was going on at school.”

Adam said, “That’s when they talked to my parents about sending him to school, here in Minneapolis.   That’s when he met me.”

Robbie put his arm around Adam’s shoulders.  “It was the best day of my life.”

Adam grinned, and said, “We’ve been inseparable, since then.”

Justin laughed.   “Including when they were having sex with me.”

Robbie said, “I didn’t hear you complaining about having a threesome with us.”

Justin said, “I’m not complaining, I’m just noting for the record that you two come as a package deal.”

Adam said, “Yes, we had your number, Justin.   We knew exactly what you needed to bring you out of your depression.”

Justin smiled, and said, “Yes, you did help me.   You gave me a reason for living.”

“Someone had to keep an eye on you, since you attempted to kill yourself,” Robbie said.

J.F. looked at Justin, with a sudden interest.  He asked, “What happened to you?”

Justin said, “I’m not sure you want to hear about me.”  He had a haunted expression on his face.

Brian took his hand, and said, “You don’t have to tell them, Justin.   I don’t want you to have a relapse.”

Justin turned to his husband, and said, “I will only tell my story this one time.   I think it will help J.F.”   He looked over at J.F.  “I want you to know that you’re not alone.   There are several of us here, who have been through experiences similar to yours.”

J.F. looked at Justin in disbelief.   “I can’t believe anyone can understand what it was like being attacked by four policemen.”

Greg said, “I beg to differ, J.F.  When Cory and I came out to our parents, Cory’s parents were very supportive of us.   I thought that my parents would be just as supportive.   We told my parents we were gay and that we were dating, after dinner one night.   Dad seemed to be okay with us.   However, a few hours later, Cory and I were sitting on the couch, watching a movie, when my Dad attacked us with a baseball bat.   He nearly killed me and Cory.”

Cory said, “We spent a long time in the hospital.   They had to cut holes in our skulls to relieve the pressure of the swelling.”   Cory lifted his shoulder length hair, to show the scar on his scalp.   “This is where they removed the bone from my skull.”

Following Cory’s example, Greg lifted the hair covering his scar, and said, “I have a similar scar.   We both had our arms and legs in casts.   It took us a long time to recover.   We both have really bad headaches, at times.   Fortunately, my Dad is in jail and will be there for a long time to come.”

J.F. met Greg eyes, and said, “I’m sorry.   I misjudged you.   I’ve been feeling sorry for myself a lot, lately.   I guess I didn’t realize that I’m not the only one who has been beaten for being gay.”

Greg said, “At least your mother doesn’t blame you for putting your Dad in jail, or causing your family to fall apart.”  

There was a deep bitterness in his voice that pierced J.F.’s heart.   He looked away from the pain he saw on Greg’s face.   Henri took his hand in his, and gave it a squeeze.  J.F. met Greg’s gaze.   “I’m sorry for your loss, Greg.  You’re right, I should be grateful that my mother has been very supportive of me.”

Justin said, “When I came out to my parents, they disowned me.   I packed up the few things I owned, and loaded them into my car.   I’ve never been back.   I was in my first year of college, here.   I was living in the dorms, then.”

He stopped, and wiped the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand.  Brian said, “You don’t have to do this, Justin.”

Peyton watched Justin closely.   He sensed that Justin carried some very deep emotional wounds.   Greg and Cory had shared their story with him, when he first came to live with the Scarboroughs.   He knew that they still carried mental and emotional scars; but, he had also witnessed their strength and resiliency.

He had met Justin at the Scarborough home, and had felt a certain kinship with the man.   He knew that Justin had been through some terrible things, judging from how all of his friends protected him.   He had been impressed with Brian’s attentiveness to his husband, and remembered thinking at the time that he envied Justin for capturing such a wonderful guy.

Now, he watched as Brian put his arm around Justin’s shoulders, trying to comfort him.   Justin turned his head, and kissed Brian on the lips.   “I love you, babe; but, I need to do this.”

Brian nodded his head, and said, “Okay.”

Peyton noticed the shimmer of unshed tears in Brian’s eyes.   To cause such a reaction in his husband, Justin’s experience had to be something extremely bad.

Justin said, “When I got back to my dorm room that night, I cried myself to sleep.  I spent the rest of that weekend trying to get myself together.   I had enough money in my bank account to pay my expenses for a few months.  Fortunately, the account was in my name, and not my parents, because they took the money my grandparents gave me for college.   My Dad called the bank and had the money transferred out of the account.   I went into the bank to get the money for my tuition, and found out it was gone.  I had to drop out of college the next semester, to find work.  But, before I moved out of the dorms, my roommate, Alex, came home late one night from a party, and found me crying my eyes out.”   Here he stopped, and ran his hand through his hair.  

Robbie asked, “Are you sure you want to talk about Alex?”

Justin said, “I need to talk about Alex.   Alex sat on the bed next to me, and put his arms around me.”   Justin relived that moment, as he told the guys about Alex.

*** ***

Justin sat on the bed with his head in his hands, sobbing and feeling totally and completely alone in the world.   He had been so lost in his own misery that he failed to notice that Alex had come back from the party with his fraternity brothers.   Alex was 6’3” (191 cm.), well-built, with curly blond hair, mischievous bright blue eyes, a broad nose, and a slightly crooked grin.   He weighed 190 lbs. (86 kg.).  He played a lot of basketball at the gym, as well as hitting the weights.  As a result, Alex was a gay guy’s wet dream.   He often walked around their room in the buff, giving Justin a lot of fantasy material!  Justin had spent most of the semester trying to hide his attraction to Alex.   He loved hanging out with Alex and he was afraid he would lose his friendship, if he found out Justin was gay.

Alex walked over, and sat on the bed next to Justin, putting his arm around Justin’s shoulders.  “What’s wrong, Justin?”  Justin had sat bolt upright, as if he had been stung.  “Justin, it’s just me, your roommate, Alex.”

Justin said, “You scared me.”

“I know, and I’m sorry for startling you,” Alex said.  “But, you haven’t answered my question.”

Justin asked, “Will you promise not to hate me, if I tell you?”

Alex gave him a puzzled look.   “Why would I hate you?”

“I don’t know, but you might after I tell you what’s wrong,” Justin responded, fear tinging his voice.

“I promise I won’t hate you, Justin.   Now, tell me what’s going on,” Alex said.

Justin poured his heart out to his roommate, telling him about coming out to his parents, and their reaction.   He told Alex how they had taken his college tuition money, forcing him to leave school at the end of the semester to find a job.   He didn’t know where he could find work or where he was going to live.

Alex listened attentively to Justin’s narrative, keeping his arm around his shoulders the entire time.   When he finished, he pulled Justin into his arms, and held him tight.   Justin slipped his arms around Alex’s waist and buried his face in his chest.   Alex continued to hold him, as Justin let his emotions find an outlet, watering Alex’s shirt with his tears.

Alex rubbed his back, and said, “It’s going to be okay, Justin.”

Justin pulled back, and looked up into Alex’s eyes.   “You mean you don’t hate me?”

“No, I don’t hate you, Justin.   You’re my friend, and I’m angry at the way your family has treated you,” Alex said.

Justin said, “So, you aren’t going to kick me out of your room?”

Alex laughed, and said, “No, Justin, I’m not going to kick you out of our room.   Now, that I know your gay, it explains a lot of things.   I’m sorry that I’ve paraded naked around our room all semester.   I caught you looking at me, from time to time; but, I never would have guessed that you were gay.”

Justin grinned, and said, “Don’t apologize, Alex.   I love seeing you naked.”

Alex rubbed his hand over Justin’s crotch, and said, “I bet you do, given your reaction to my touch.” 

Justin’s cock had sprung to full mast, and was straining to get free.   Alex continued to stroke him, through the fabric of his jeans.  Alex leaned over, and kissed Justin.   At first, it was gentle kiss, but soon deepened.   They came up for air, Justin gasping for breath.  

Alex grinned, and said, “You’re a great kisser, Justin.”

Justin said, “And, so are you.”

Alex asked, “Before we go any further, Justin, I want to know if this is what you want?   I’m horny as hell, and I want to fuck you; but, I won’t go any further if you aren’t ready to have a relationship with me.”

Justin asked, “My concern is that you’ll fuck me; then, you’ll hate me forever for turning you gay.”

Alex looked at Justin in surprise.  “I won’t hate you, Justin.   I may not be gay, but I do want to have a relationship with you.   I like you a lot, and find you very attractive.”

Justin could feel the heat of Alex’s body next to him, and wanted so much to have this gorgeous man fuck him.   Every fiber of his body wanted this man, even though he had doubts about being in a relationship with Alex.   He decided that he would chance being hurt, if things didn’t work out for them.

*** ***

Justin said, “That night will always be a treasured memory for me.   I loved Alex very much, and he loved me, or so I thought, at the time.”

Peyton could see that the memory of that night had caused a tent to appear in Justin’s pants.   He looked over at Brian, to see if he had noticed.   Brian met his eyes, and smiled.   “Yes, I know that Justin still has feelings for Alex; but only for the man Alex used to be, not the man Alex has become.”

Justin took Brian’s hand in his.   “I love you, Brian.”

Brian smiled, and replied, “I love you, too.”

Justin returned to his narrative.  “The next semester, we moved into an apartment, near campus.  I got a job working at a grocery store as a cashier.   I still didn’t make enough money, so I started working a second job.  Things went well for us.   Alex was always very attentive and we had fantastic sex!   I managed to save enough money to start back to school that next fall.   I look back on our first two years together as our golden years, because by the third year, Alex started to change.   He would come home drunk from partying with his fraternity brothers.   Alex is a mean drunk.   He started to beat me, accusing me of turning him into a faggot.   He would stay away from home for days at a time.   I knew he was staying with his girlfriends, trying to convince himself that he was straight.   Then, he would come home in a drunken stupor, and beat me up.   I would make up my mind to leave him, then he would apologize, and beg me to stay.   He claimed he couldn’t live without me.   Things would get better, for a while, then, he’d get drunk again.”

“Didn’t anyone call the cops, when he beat you?” Jonathan asked.

“No, the cops wouldn’t have helped me.   They would have encouraged him to keep going.   That is what he told me, because he didn’t want to be put in jail.   I was so afraid of him, I didn’t dare tell anyone what was happening to me.” Justin said, shuddering at the memory.

“Then, one night, he said he was going to kill me.   I managed to get free of him, and ran out of the apartment.   I screamed for help, and one of the neighbors came out their apartment.   I begged her to call the cops.   I told her that Alex was going to kill me.   She didn’t believe me, until she saw Alex come running after me.   He caught me and dragged me back into our apartment.   He kept hitting me, until I collapsed on the ground.   He kept kicking me, then he broke both of my arms, and he would have killed me, if the cops hadn’t arrived when they did.”

Justin stopped, and leaned against his husband.   It was obvious that he was completely drained, from reliving what had happened to him.   Adam said, “I’ll tell the rest of the story.   Justin moved in with his friend, Sarah, and her two boys, Mitch and Jerry.   They nursed him back to health.”

“It wasn’t long after that that we met him,” Robbie said.  “Actually, it was Glenn who met him, first.  Justin had joined the gay men’s chorus, and Glenn had gone to their concert.   He approached Justin after the concert, asking how he could become a member.”

Justin said, “I had become very depressed, and I’d decided I had nothing to live for.   I bought a gun and some ammunition.   That night, I went to a gay bar, to have one last night out, before killing myself.   I had written a note, and intended to leave it with whomever I could get to take me home with them, when I saw Glenn.  I wanted to talk with him, one last time, so I went over to their table.   The guys invited me to join them.”

He stopped, unable to proceed, because of the strong emotions that washed over him.   The guys waited, silently, until he was sufficiently recovered to go continue.  “They made me feel welcome, and showed a genuine interest in me.   The more I talked with Glenn and his friends, the more I wanted to be one of them.  I, finally, showed them my suicide note.  They read it, and they calmly took control of the situation.   They took the gun from me, and took me into their home.   With their love and support, I got the treatment I needed.  I’m not completely cured of all the mental and emotional ills that plague me, but I have wonderful friends and a loving husband to help me through the rough times.”  He looked around the room, and said, “I love each of you, and can’t thank you enough for being here for me.”   Justin turned to his husband, and kissed him, tenderly.   “You, I love most of all, Babe.”

There were tears in everyone’s eyes, as he finished speaking.   The sat in silence, as each man pondered Justin’s words.   The impact of his life’s story could be seen on each of their faces.  Justin looked around the room, noting the different expressions on their faces.  His gaze lingered on J.F.’s face.  J.F. finally raised his eyes to meet Justin’s. 

He smiled, and said, “Thank you.” 

Justin smiled back, and said, “You’re welcome.”

*** ***

Author’s Note:

Wisconsin Cheese Factories - http://www.wisconline.com/attractions/cheese.html